Time passes, things change

Ive hit that time in my life when I think I am ready to settle down in the area. As in, its house hunting time. I guess I felt like now is as good of a time as any... I have held the same job for a few years, my lease for my apartment comes up at the end of October, and I am sick of throwing money away on renting something. While I have some sort of wanderlust, I also have a silly sense of obligation and the need to stay somewhat in the area / be stable with money.

Of course looking for a house adds a new level of stress. Money constraints, wishes for nicer places, monthly payments, etc etc etc. And there are so many additional costs that you have to remind yourself of: heating, homeowners insurance, random things breaking, closing costs, property taxes. Honestly its a nightmare and I will be happy when this process is over. Even moreso because I will have some of the things I have wanted for so long - a room to be able to do my artwork / writing / shirt making, more storage for things I have, someplace to brew my own wine, etc. There are lots of little processes I would love to take part in... but I cant with my current living constraints.

Aside from that its always really interesting to me to look at the many things that people do in their lives in order to change. For me... well change is coming rather fast. A coworker of mine passed away a few weeks ago from a massive heart attack, and then my stepfather was in the hospital for chest pain the following week. On some level I think that really played on my own psyche since I have changed my eating habits completely. Thats right, Ive balanced my diet, and I consume less and less now. Why? Well again, part of it had to do with fear, but part also had to do with comfort. What people miss is the feelings inside I have had. For example - most people wouldnt be able to pinpoint that I was having some major stomach issues that I was dealing with, but I was having some real troubles. So after changing my intake, I realized how much better I feel. heh.

I got rid of cable too. And now I see just how much time I wasted in front of the tv. In the past few months I have read through a few books Ive been meaning to get to, finished off some magazines, cleaned things out, etc etc etc. Aka all things I have been meaning to do but just never did. Now - I have more than enough time.

next book im reading - http://www.amazon.com/Monster-Autobiography-L-Member/dp/0802141447

and now im off. back to work. then tonight, a few drinks and roaming around looking at houses. heres to hoping i find one.

cheers.